Grief, Stillness, and the Path Forward

Grief has a way of stopping time.

In the wake of loss, everything feels like it's been put on pause. The world continues to spin, people go about their lives, but inside—there’s silence. A deep, aching stillness that settles into the bones. We may find ourselves stuck there, frozen in moments and memories, unsure how to take even one step forward without the person we’ve lost.

This is the hidden weight of grief. It’s not just the sorrow—it’s the disorientation, the fear that moving forward means leaving them behind. That if we start to smile again, to laugh, to love, we are somehow betraying their memory.

But that isn’t what our loved ones would want for us.

Those who loved us in life wouldn’t want their passing to be the reason we stopped living. They wouldn’t want our story to end because theirs did. If anything, they’d want us to keep going—for them, for ourselves, for the ones still with us. To honor their life by continuing to live ours fully.

Moving forward doesn’t mean forgetting. It means learning how to carry their love with us in a different way. Their presence may no longer be physical, but the impact they made—the memories, the love, the lessons—those don’t fade. They live in us.

And as we take those first few shaky steps out of the stillness of grief, something begins to shift. Life slowly starts to soften again. Light peeks through the cracks. A small laugh, an unexpected smile, a moment of peace. These are signs that healing is happening, even if we don’t feel ready.

In time, we begin to rebuild—not the life we had before, but a new one. A life where grief and joy can coexist. A life that still holds meaning. That still has love. And in doing so, we honor those we’ve lost by refusing to remain stuck in sorrow. We show them that their love was strong enough to help us heal.

Honoring Their Life in a Meaningful Way

One way to support the healing process is to find a way to actively honor those who have passed. This can look different for everyone, depending on your beliefs and traditions. Some may choose to set up an ancestor altar with photos, candles, or mementos that keep the connection alive. Others may plant a tree in their loved one’s memory, create a piece of art, write a letter, or donate to a cause that reflects their values.

These acts are not about clinging to the past—they’re about transforming our pain into something beautiful and purposeful. They help us carry the legacy of those we've lost into the future, turning grief into remembrance, and remembrance into love in action.

If You Feel Stuck, Reach Out

Grief is a natural process, but sometimes it can become overwhelming. If you find yourself unable to move forward after a long period of time—if your days feel frozen, your energy drained, and your sense of hope lost—it’s okay to ask for help. Talking with a counselor, therapist, or grief support group can make all the difference. There is no shame in reaching out. Healing doesn't have to happen alone.

So if you're grieving, know this: you don’t have to rush. But you do have to move, even if it’s slowly. Even if all you can manage today is one small breath, one small step. Keep going.

Not because you’re forgetting them—but because you remember them with every step forward.

And that is one of the greatest ways to say I love you.